Reagan Pyramid Nears Completion
"'Buried with Reagan will be his finest treasures,' Meese said, 'including 2,500 MX intercontinental ballistic missiles, 15 stealth bombers, a golden chalice of jelly beans, and his most prized servant, former president George Bush Sr.'

Bush told reporters, 'It is my honor and duty to have my sinus passages ceremonially packed with sand before my still-living, pain-racked body is forever locked with my leader's within the Great Reagan's final resting place. Let us all praise Osiris.'"