Wednesday, March 17, 2004

Gandalf Gets Swivey on the Wheels by Sasha Frere-Jones
"The hometown crush is crunk, our own version of dancehall: full of fire, committed to staying local, and not all that interested in moving from A to B. Consistency puts trunk salesmen on the red carpet and asses between windows and walls. And yes--I discount your beats if your MC is a jerk who asks a woman to do anything against her will, including but not limited to adjusting her purple Lycra bicycle shorts. Call me uptight, feminist lite, or Dionne Warwick's water bearer, but people have no right to treat other people like Kleenex. Do Tim and Magoo get a pass here? A thousand times no. 'Cold Cutz' is the least appealing sexual metaphor in a pretty bad month, and the video for 'Indian Flute,' from Tim and Magoo's current Under Construction Part II, is a sexist (and racist, bonus beat!) piece of shit, but, hey, they're not Lil' Flip, whose work I cannot debase any further than he has himself. AnD--please lower the neon 'get out of jail' sign from the rafter--Tim works with Missy. Tim works with Missy. Add 4,000 points. Not fair? Did I leave the text behind? Go on any hip-hop video set and ask a woman shaking her butt into a fish-eye lens what the fucking text is. "